#stickershock
I've been sitting with this blog in an open window for over a week. I've been trying to digest the very conflicted thoughts & feelings I've had. I wasn't happy putting my 1st response out into the interwebz. And frankly, I'm still hesitant to put it out there, partly due to the fact that very few people reading this can actually understand.
( You can find some helpful tips Here on what to say to women dealing with infertility.)
I've been blessed with some wonderful relationships in my life. I've been blessed to have a wonderful family, immediate & extended. They've always supported me.
But the majority of them have no idea how to handle this. I don't even know how to handle this.
So after learning about 3 new, unplanned pregnancies among friends, it's hard toadmit explain the fact that I have to spend $1300 for 1 cycle of fertility treatments. And that it might not work, in which case we'll have to do another cycle. And that that 1 cycle is all that we can afford to do for months, while we sit and try to accrue enough money in our HSA & savings to shoot for another month. (and there goes our trip to comic-con. Maybe our RE can go for us instead.)
After a 3 month break, we'll be back at it in March. It's a single shot deal though until we can afford another one. So, hopefully it works. We can try this 3 times until the RE wants to do something more drastic.
These 3 cycles (at $1300 a pop, in case you missed that part.) Only include oral meds & injectables (and obviously pelvic u/s & monitoring.) One of the least invasive, least expensive treatments. I feel like I can't complain too much, because compared to IVF treatments, this is barely a drop in the bucket. That s an eventuality we have to consider.
I'm not holding out hope anymore. If it happens, it happens and we'll be ecstatic. If it doesn't, we'll try again until we reach our stopping point. This endless cycle of hope & disappointment is wearying on a heart. I'm beginning to think that there is no rhyme or reason to who gets pregnant and who doesn't. Life isn't fair. Apparently that includes the lack of life as well.
I had loads more typed out for this post, but decided that putting my raw emotions out there wasn't my best bet. Theres a lot of them, at various stages of development. So for this post, it's just going to be the facts as they are.
(Sorry, I know this is super disjointed. I just wanted to get the stupid tab off of my screen, and the OCD in me demanded that I post SOMETHING.) It's not my favorite post. I have a few others hiding in the wings I'll pull out. I can promise that they'll be up to my usual par :)
I'm just stuck on the suckiness/ sticker shock of the last week (did I mention that the $$ part terrifies me? Seriously, makes me nauseous/dizzy/anxious/tad bit depressed. ) But I'm grateful for the few friends who understand this, and the many who try to. :)
( You can find some helpful tips Here on what to say to women dealing with infertility.)
I've been blessed with some wonderful relationships in my life. I've been blessed to have a wonderful family, immediate & extended. They've always supported me.
But the majority of them have no idea how to handle this. I don't even know how to handle this.
So after learning about 3 new, unplanned pregnancies among friends, it's hard to
After a 3 month break, we'll be back at it in March. It's a single shot deal though until we can afford another one. So, hopefully it works. We can try this 3 times until the RE wants to do something more drastic.
These 3 cycles (at $1300 a pop, in case you missed that part.) Only include oral meds & injectables (and obviously pelvic u/s & monitoring.) One of the least invasive, least expensive treatments. I feel like I can't complain too much, because compared to IVF treatments, this is barely a drop in the bucket. That s an eventuality we have to consider.
I'm not holding out hope anymore. If it happens, it happens and we'll be ecstatic. If it doesn't, we'll try again until we reach our stopping point. This endless cycle of hope & disappointment is wearying on a heart. I'm beginning to think that there is no rhyme or reason to who gets pregnant and who doesn't. Life isn't fair. Apparently that includes the lack of life as well.
I had loads more typed out for this post, but decided that putting my raw emotions out there wasn't my best bet. Theres a lot of them, at various stages of development. So for this post, it's just going to be the facts as they are.
(Sorry, I know this is super disjointed. I just wanted to get the stupid tab off of my screen, and the OCD in me demanded that I post SOMETHING.) It's not my favorite post. I have a few others hiding in the wings I'll pull out. I can promise that they'll be up to my usual par :)
I'm just stuck on the suckiness/ sticker shock of the last week (did I mention that the $$ part terrifies me? Seriously, makes me nauseous/dizzy/anxious/tad bit depressed. ) But I'm grateful for the few friends who understand this, and the many who try to. :)
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